I love Ellie! General bitching, and WTF is a post from June 2015 so popular?

Last night Ellie and I had a bit of a tiff.

Nothing bad.

No yelling, screaming, nor anything that I hear from others who argue.

I made dinner for the Misses and myself.

It was sausage gravy with mashed potatoes, beets for Big Miss, Ellie and myself.  Little Miss doesn't like beets, so I was expecting her to eat spinach, which she loves.

Well, Ellie's targeted diet is towards vegetarian/vegan.

She didn't want to eat the food with the rest of us, because of the meat...

But...

Instead she pulled out these yummy pasta shells & cheese from Schwans.

They're full of cheese/dairy and fat.

Cooked them all and was about to eat them all.

I got pissed and told her that I was confused that she was being a hypocrite in her diet...

She'd eat the dairy/cheese/fat like that, but wouldn't eat the food with minimal amounts of dairy/fat/meat.

The ratio of sausage to the rest of the food was very little.

We got into the discussion of how to adapt the diet she's targeting with the diet the rest of us are eating.

It's important that we share and plan out our meals so that we can satisfy everyone without going back to a diet with very little veggies and fiber.

So, we got a vegetable soup all made up and into the crock-pot, which I turned on this morning after adding some Quinoa to it.

Last night, Ellie and I skipped our new regular "intellectual discussions", because it was getting late...

Unfortunately, it turned to the pain in my knees because it hurt like hell trying to sleep.

Our encounters help, because I participate heavily despite the knee pain.

It seems the endorphin's & what not really help to deal with the pain during and last for a while after.

The pain though is really bad, and I started into my blue funk state because it hurts no matter how I lay on it.

Rather, I can lay on my back without too much pain, but when I need to move, it really, really hurts.

It feels like ground hamburger in there with 3/4 minus gravel mixed in.

When moving the knee, it grinds the gravel further into the hamburger of the knee joint & bones, and hurts something awful.

I complained that there wasn't anything else that modern medicine could do, because I've done it all.

1. I lost weight.
1. Almost 50 pounds from my heaviest a few years ago.
2. Another 20 pounds since October.
2. I exercise the knee.
1. I use a small exercise ball and resistance band.
2. I continue to walk when it's not too awful, which is still an 8+ on the pain scale.
3. I cannot take NSAIDs.
1. I pee blood.
2. They cause me diarrhea. 
3. They contribute to my kidney stones
4. I have done cortisone injects.
1. Done in both knees multiple times.
2. Had it in my hips just before Christmas without success.
5. My use of opiods for pain only masks the pain.
6. Knee braces don't help, because they cannot change the pain caused by just the movement of the knee.
7. The left knee is the one that feels like gravel infused hamburger.
8. My right catches and pops with almost every step.
1. The catching gets worse the more I walk.
2. The pain also gets worse the more I walk.

I used to only take 1 of my "breakthrough" pain pills a day or less.

This lead me to a large reserve. (Almost 2 months extra!)

Recently, because of my pain severity, I've been using all 3 of my allotted "breakthrough" pills a day.

Even worse, I've started to use more than the 3.

Earlier this year, I was able lower my need for the buffered pain medication, so that I had almost a month and a half extra.

I had to start using 3 of those a day instead of my normal morning/night use. (12 hour difference.)

Where is this leading with my love for Ellie?

She's my strength and anchor in life, and really understands that I am not an addict with my pain medications.

Ellie was able to help calm me down and settle the depression funk I dropped into last night because the doctors usually treat me the same... "Pat me on the head and give me another supply of prescriptions for these "hard" pain medications. Then follow up with 'sorry...'"


Now to the June 3, 2015 post..

The title of it is "and if I get melancholy, which can happen, I expect you to be my companion and solace me."

Now that I look at the content of that post, I'm not certain if it's the title or the content.

You'll just have to read it to see if it's that intriguing. (http://jaredstrider.blogspot.com/2015/06/and-if-i-get-melancholy-which-can.html)