Damn! Was I sick!

Since all of the surgeries were cancelled for the Surgeon, which includes my knee replacement, I'm starting to see that it was probably good for me.

Although, it sucks because I still get to deal with the pain from the knees on a daily basis.

It does seem like providence, that it happened.

During the time between when I got the bad news and now, Ellie and the Misses have been sick with a fever/cold/flu thing.

Then the past 5+ days I've been sick myself.

Mostly with a cold, which turned pretty ugly Sunday through today.

It started with the usual cold, congestion, cough, etc.  Nothing major.

My eyes were having problems when I woke up on Friday and Saturday, because they were crusty with stuff.  Also, my ears have been really been FUBAR.  Everything was muffled and I had lots of pressure.

Saturday before Easter Sunday, I barely had any sleep.

We went out to Ellie's folk's place I started to get a lot of sinus pain, and it managed to get better by the time we ate dinner and finally sat down to chat.

After a bit, I got really drowsy, so I laid down in the spare bedroom to nap.

It wasn't good sleep because things were noisy, which they always are with all the nieces and nephews around.

When I got up a bit later, my eyes were really goopy.

In the bathroom, I cleaned and cleaned my eyes out.

When I was done, I went back to the bedroom put on my glasses.

By the time I got back to the bathroom, only a few feet, my eyes were goopy again.

I showed this to Ellie and she decided it was time to go.

Ellie's sister called out "Everyone! Wash your hands!"

Now, I had been doing that vigilantly since I had this nasty cold going on.

On Monday, I went to the walk-in clinic early in the morning.

The Dr. there said that the eye, cold, ear stuff should clear up soon if I kept things clean, which I had been doing.

Except he did say that the eye stuff was pink-eye and was most likely caused by rubbing my eyes after wiping my nose.

Basically, I gave it to myself by infecting my own eyes.

This Dr. also gave me an Rx for an antibiotic because of my frequent sinus infections.

(wow, does this post just keep going or what!?)

Monday Night, I took the Antibiotic, and "slept" which didn't really work because I got one of those nasty sinus pressure "headaches" that lasted all night, and most of Tuesday "morning".

Actually, after everyone went to school, I waited to take the antibiotic for a bit because I was feeling a bit queasy.

Well, it happened and I emptied my stomach and flushed my breakfast down the drain.

An hour or so later, I finally started to feel better, and I took the antibiotic.

I slept most of the day on Tuesday.  In between, I watched these REALLY cheesy B rated movies I bought on a DVD I bought for $6. (I'm going to toss the disc.  None of the movies were really that great.)

Well, today I'm feeling better, but my ear still feels like shit.  I have stuff dripping down my throat.

I don't hurt, but it still sucks.

I guess where I'm going with this post (finally!) is that I don't know if it's really been a curse that the surgery was canceled.

My only major problem with the cancellation is that I'm not certain when/if it will be scheduled again.

The current time frame I have for the actual surgery might be in August.

This morning Ellie said she's going to push for a bilateral replacement.  Which is replacing both knees at one time.

It'll be a lot of work for me, and possibly hurt like hell, but at least it'll all be over with in one shot.

Then I'll be two joints closer to being a Cyberdyne Terminator. :)

I have to write this down before I leave.

This last week, I've started to have that fight or flight type of feeling, with my heart racing off/on.  Or at least it feels like it's racing.

It was also because of the depression and anger from my cancel knee replacement.

The last few days, I've taken half of 25mg of Seroquel at night.

I know, I know, I know.

It messes with my blood pressure, but it's the only thing that can calm down what's happening to me.

Today, I'm going out to Ellie's folk's house with the Misses.

Ellie's mom asked for some help with her computer.

Well, I asked for the computer to be here, so that I can backup/image the drive.

Then I could start work on it...

Or

Get it ready to do a system restore, patch & upgrade everything, then restore her individual files.

She didn't want to do that.

She "needed" her data there too much to let me have it.

Well, I'm not certain what's up her butt about it... but there is.

Of course, she's still acting cold towards me...

That is...

Until she needs/wants something from me.

Then she's all buddy/pal/pal with me.

Well, I am still having trouble with the fight or flight problem...

AND

I've had a nasty sinus attack in the last hour.

The last few days I've been battling a nasty cold.

Today, I thought I'd use a sinus rinse with a nose "douche" to wash out my sinuses.

I got a lot of green goo out, but it also triggered my sinus attack.

Just now, I'm starting to feel better, but that's probably from the pain killer I took and the Claritin.

Which means it's more than likely allergy related and not a cold.

Or perhaps it's a sinus infection.

Or perhaps, again, what got washed up into the upper sinuses that's causing the pain finally moved/released/drained/etc.

I just hope that whatever is giving me the fight or flight is calmed down now.

It usually agitates me into an angry state and I tend to lash out.

That and I usually just become the worlds biggest asshole.

God bless, and remember this Easter that Jesus lives!

Being upset with a foul mouth like mine can really get you into trouble.

Friday night, Ellie, the Misses & I went to a local food place to eat "in".  It's kind of a fast food place, but it makes almost full meals, and you order and bring it home.

I didn't necessarily feel good at first, mostly because it almost always seems that no one can just getup and go out somewhere.

Well at the place we were ordering from, I couldn't really read their freakin' menu and what I ordered was supposed to be "mini" because I wasn't really hungry.

On the way home, Ellie started into her tirade about how my car makes this noise, or that noise and that she didn't think it was safe...

blah
blah
blah

Well, I got pissed when we got home and I left the car telling her that perhaps she should get it fixed and quit complaining about it so much.

Maybe I didn't say it, but I sure as heck thought it.

Well, when we got inside, the kids were trying to distribute the food and I was doing something else.

When I saw the size of the "mini" thing, I got pissed.

I thought Ellie had ordered it and I didn't want anything that big at all!

I tried to cut it in half, then decided I should quarter it.

When I couldn't do it easily I gave up on the thing.

We had been watching the "Heroes" TV series on DVD's recently.

I told them to just start it and that I didn't care.

Ellie started to push me to sit down and watch it, even when I said I didn't care and that they should just watch the shows anyway.

I was tired, but Ellie really cornered me out there in front the Misses and I got mad and told her that I was going to sit here, even though I didn't want to.

Then she went into how I should take a pill...

Well, I got mad and told her that I was OK and to just leave me alone.

So, I sat there and knit a few rows of this nightmare of a project.

Then I got so tired I told her I was going to bed.

I wasn't mad, I wasn't upset...

I was just TIRED.

After all, I haven't slept good in weeks! or more!

Well, I went into the bedroom, laid down.

I woke up on Saturday...

I mean, I woke up only on Saturday morning, and I was still mad about the car.

So we started talking about it.

Now, I had talked to a mechanic several times about it, and it's a noisy power steering pump.

I talked to the mechanics several times.

Ellie just knows that it makes noise and said that the mechanic said it needed to be replaced.

Well, this got to be a "I'm a better expert" or "I know more than you do" conversation... again...

I got mad, and pissed, so I told her if she knew so f-ing much then she should get it fixed.

Well, Ellie flew into a pissed off tirade and said that she should leave.

I told her to go.

I was mad, and she was mad.

I am just mad that she can't just stop and listen sometimes.

Seriously, I know she hears me, but doesn't always listen.

She left, really, really pissed off.

Before she left, I asked her if she was going to wake up the Misses and drive being as pissed off as she was.

She stopped for a second and then left.

I got worried, because she didn't take her phone.

Finally, I looked at the calendar and realized she had a nail appointment around the same time.

Ellie did return home and showed me her nails, but she was still really pissed off.

A bit later, I decided I was going to crawl under the house to spread some insecticide around the kitchen area.

During my crawling endeavour, I hurt my knee several times, banged my head and started to really feel suffocated from all the gear I had on. (Gloves, long sleeved shirt, bandanna around my mouth, etc)

This didn't help anything.

I finally decided after I couldn't really get to where I wanted to get easily, I crawled out.

When I got out, I stepped into the shower full dressed.

I did this because the knee surgery process is highly focused on an almost sterile process before the surgery.  I wanted to minimize the amount of "non-normal" dirt in the house.

The shoes got rinsed/washed out well, the socks, long sleeved coat, pants, shirts, etc...

As I did this I tossed them onto floor.

When I was done, and dried, I went into the bathroom, threw them into a hamper and drug it back to the utility room.

Swearing and using the f-word most of the time whenever things really hurt.

When I finally sat down, it hit me that Ellie had been avoiding me, with the exception of any direct questions.

It was shortly after that, when Ellie and I talked about things.

We discussed how the F-word was, really, really bad... and Ellie is VERY offended that it was used towards her.

We talked about the car, which I reminded her was possibly the 4th or 6th time we had this discussion about the car in the last 4 months.

Part of this discussion went into things that we hadn't been doing, which turned out that we're not communicating about very good (figures right?)...

Ellie said that she had to be able to express her feelings or she would feel controlled.

I told her the same thing and that I, more often than not, don't do and usually feel that she never let me do...

She thought about it and I think she did understand that it did happen.

Finally, we got to how I was being cornered the night before about the damn TV show.

She apologized for it.

Then we discussed the Bipolar Disorder problems.

Bipolar is a terrible thing to deal with.

It's not for sissies on either side of it.

You can't be a sissy and suffer with it...

Nor can you be a sissy and be married or involved with a Bipolar person.

If you've been following this blog, you know that I am abhorred by the actions that have happened in the past and even recently because of the problems being bipolar causes.

Ellie thought I was using being Bipolar as an "excuse" for things, but I told her that I don't hide behind it and I really don't think it was fair.

I accept the actions that I took, although I can say that being Bipolar influences a lot of my actions.

I pointed out those journal entries that I recently added to this blog... How I realized the problem was there and I had to do something.

It was a real big problem trying to figure out how to deal with things...

I never tried to hide and excuse my stupid actions as... "I'm sorry, my bipolar made me do that".

Bipolar does affect things and at least these days, I realize that a problem is happening...

Unfortunately I might not realize it right away....

But I AM trying really, really hard to recognize when a problem is happening and to think, why am I doing this?

Am I really justified in my actions and thoughts?

As part of my journal entries, I told Ellie that the pain from those sinus headaches was also a very large problem and influence on my actions.

These days, I rarely get sinus problems, since I started using or have a cool mist humidifier running almost all the time I'm working.

Or I suppose, I am in an an environment with higher humidity.

My intake of pain killers for the sinus pain is almost 0 these days.

I'm very, very excited for this upcoming knee replacement.

It's part of the final steps towards the elimination of my major source of pain.

In short, because I'm rambling on and the ramble is going to be another entry...

I love Ellie!

It's not that we can't disagree.

It's just that I need to keep my dang mouth in check around everyone more often and keep away from the F-Word..

Which is really hard for me whenever I'm under great duress.

The duress/stress/pain only contributes to the problem...

It does not make me use the word.

I'm sorry my dearest Ellie!

Why does everyone push for the weekend?

I'm all for having days off, but why push so hard for it?

Without looking for an actual answer, the answers to me are actually apparent.

Everyone loves a day off from their "routine" of work & school.

Lord knows I waited for the weekends when I was in school.  I can only remember how miserable I was most of the time and really, really looked forward to the weekend.

Since I graduated in 1992, I can't say that I've really looked forward to the weekends/days off on a regular basis since I stopped working for a large retailer.

Not looked for or only wanted a weekend...

Maybe I can't really explain what I mean yet.

Since 2000 I've been married to Ellie and I always wanted to get away from work ASAP just to spend my time with her.

With our children being born a few years after we were married, it was the same way for me to come home to the entire family!

Pondering over my ideas and feelings towards the weekend, perhaps isn't about the weekend.  Rather it's about trying to leave my current state of mind and being behind.

This week I was in the corporate office more than I have been in months.  Which was only 3 days.  I am going to try really hard to work from the office 2+ days a week again.

On my first day back in the office, I parked on the west side of the large building like I had for over a year now.  My usual routine was to go up the elevator to the second floor then hobble down to my office.  What I didn't know that the corporate split actually involved the splitting/separation of the large buildings.  This meant when I hobbled down towards the office, I found that a wall had been erected.  To this, I turned around and hobbled back to the service elevator and hobbled towards the next closest elevator on the other side of this wall.  Looking into the recess of the elevator, I found that it was closed for repairs.  Again, I had to hobble down to another elevator, which was actually at the east entrance of the building, then walk half way back between the two entrances to my actual office.  In short, I hobbled almost a mile just to get to my office to start work.




Right now I don't feel very good, mentally and physically.

My knees and hips hurt from all walking, my sinuses are full thick stuff again and I feel like I haven't slept good in days.

Yesterday, I went to put on a pair of pants for a change, and found that my weight or bloat had gotten so bad that I couldn't fit into my new pants, which were a bit bigger than my old ones... They just weren't broken in enough for me to fit into as well as the old ones.

My sinuses are full of crap and I really, really hate it.

It's just that time of the year here, where it's getting cold and people are starting to light up their wood stoves to burn trash and/or wood.

The air just reeks of nastiness, which increases the phlegm and what not, much to my own demented pleasure.

Wrapping back around to the weekend theme...

I suppose what the weekend expectation for most of us, is the desire that not doing our normal humdrum routines will help us feel better than we did the day before.

Someday I'll be Saturday Night...

I guess I shouldn't bitch about the pain anymore, no matter how bad it hurts.

I got up and during the first morning discussion with Ellie, I said that again, I didn't sleep because the pain in my sinuses kept me awake.

Although, Friday & Saturday night I started getting the inklings of another one of these sinus irritation attacks.  Right there and then I decided to use Afrin and I slept really, really, REALLY good for the first time in almost two months.

Last night I wasn't so lucky and not only were my sinuses jacked up, my left knee wouldn't bend correctly and felt like it was locking up every time I went to bend the fucker.

During this discussion, pills came up again, as Ellie tried to fix things that she has no knowledge of.  I mean, she knows about it, she knows that I've seen doctors about these problems.  She's just forgotten that I have all of the solutions that are possible.

So, with the pill discussion I thought she brought up the fact that my pain pills were a factor and that I use them too much...

That's one argument that I'm so tired of that I got pissed and I found all of the bottles I have of pain pills and dropped all the bottles in the sink for her to take away like a good mommy.

She got pissed and then went into the tirade that I might become addicted to it, despite that I've been using these pills for many, many years.  Ellie also doesn't realize that I have extra pills every month because I don't use the full prescribed dose.

I don't always need the pain pills so I don't use them unless I need to.
I guess that makes me a fucking addict, right?

Thank goodness the school year has started and she's working again!

Well, when she went to work we hugged and I told her that if the pain would just go away, I'd never take anything ever again, not even Tylenol!

I never asked for this pain and don't wish it on anyone!
It's fucking miserable!

Today class we're going to review the same freaking shit we've done for years...

The past few weeks have been both good and really shitty.

Good because I went to the coast and spent lots of fun time with my family.

Shitty since I'm still getting those fucking sinus pain attacks where my throat is often swelling.

Pretty much almost nightly I get very congested and/or I get one of these fucking episodes.

Right now, I'm tired as all fucking hell and would rather try and sleep... but...

I don't know...

If you don't remember, I don't like taking days off when my family is home, even if I'm legitimately sick.

Ellie always seems to find work for me to do...

Anyhow... I wrote a letter to the Allergist because just leaving a voice message for him wasn't good enough and it would be better if he took 3-5 minutes to read my letter than for me to go into an appointment where he might not pay attention enough to what's going on before ending the appointment.

I'll just have to wait and see.

Wow, I'm so fucking tired...

Dear Jared Strider... I never thought this would happen to a poor boy from the city... (again)

Yesterday morning, I was starting to have the inklings of the severe sinus problems.

I had to go into the office for a Macintosh Laptop, so that I can start testing and developing my code for it.

Before I drove into the office, I used my Flonase. (Thanks for making it non-prescription assholes! It was cheaper for me because my insurance plan covered 99% of the cost.)

The air in the office is "OK", but it's heavily recirculated and extremely dry!

After an hour or two of being there, I began to have problems with my sinuses drying out and irritation.

When I got home, I thought I was going to be OK...

Well, it really wasn't.

Since I'm doing a narrative here, I'm going to carry on...

Ellie pulled out some salmon for dinner.

Well, I pulled out our little bbq plate/grill thingy and put the salmon on it, and put it into the bbq at the far end and then cooked the fish by smoking.

It turned out great!

We had some pasta salad & corn to go with it!

It was great!

Well, as things went on and got later, the sinus irritation got worse and worse.

Since we invested in a large bag of Epsom salt, and I read that soaking in a hot bath it supposed to help "cure what ails you", I hopped into the tub around midnight.

When I got out, the nausea started to hit me, so I sat on the crapper resting.

Then it really hit me and I sat on the bathroom floor trying to wait it out.

Finally it came out...

It was extremely thick and solid.

To put it in my best descriptiveness...

I was puking a turd!
No watery substance to it...
Just salmon, pasta and corn!

Seriously, it was the worse, strangest and nastiest cookie tossing I've ever done.

If you've ever seen how sausages are stuffed with those machines, that's exactly what it was like, except it was coming out of my mouth!

Now, who's hungry for pasta, fish and corn!?

Yes sir, I'll have water, served in a porcelain bowl and I'll top it myself.

Blah!

Blah!

No, I'm not auditioning for Dracula, I'm (or was) puking my guts out.

I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, etc.

It wasn't influenced by those stereotypical items.

I wasn't sick...

My left sinus passage got clogged up really badly and the pressure and amount of post nasal drippage made me really nauseated and I blew some serious chunks.

Today, I still feel a bit queasy, and for the most part it was an OK day.

I called in to work and took the day off.

I felt better after a bit and worked in my office to finish up much of the cleaning and organizing that I needed

While cleaning/organizing, I found the parts I bought for my Morse code practice oscillator to my Baofeng hand held radio interface.

One thing that I found out was the headphone jacks I bought are the really cool ones that are also switches.

Meaning, that like your cell phone, computer speakers, etc. When you plug your headphones in the music stops playing through the speaker and goes to headphones.

This will allow me to use a small speaker as both the speaker for the oscillator and the radio.  Not just that is that when headphones are plugged in the speaker goes dead.

I even worked out the switches and wiring for broadcasting over the air.

Just push and hold a momentary on switch to code, then let go when you're through.

I didn't want a permanent on/off switch. Too easy to get distracted and leave it keyed up.

I'll draw up the diagram and post it when I'm done. 

Or have a friend start up his own blog with that info.

We've been working on this stuff over the internet for a while.

It'll be fun, as there seems to be a pretty good interest in using CW over 2 meter and many of the guys who want to do this have Baofeng HT's or another type of HT that the wiring of this box adapted for.

Well, it's now Tuesday and I had to re-edit this post as I did it from my phone last night, and it needs some formatting changes and a few spelling/grammar corrections.

I'm so bored I'm lonely

I hate this shit.

I'm not feeling too well.

There's allergy snot dripping down the back of my throat.

It caused me to choke enough to heave in the toilet.

Ellie has decided that rearranging our room wasn't fucking good enough, so she's painting it too.

Right now I don't have any sort of quiet place to be.

Except outside  the fucking garden swing with all the damn pollen in the fucking air.

A little while ago, when everyone was gone, I went and slept in Little Miss's bed.

Long tail cart slept with me.  Rally close to me.  She normally doesn't sleep that close to anyone.

I suppose I do feel a bit depressed, but I don't know what to do about it.

At this time I don't want to do a fucking thing except lay down someplace quiet with clean air.

Fucking paint smells awful and it's screwing with my sinuses.

I want to be away from here.

I think I'm going to try and be at the office tomorrow... I hate working there, but it is kinder on my sinuses.

Well I'm going to just last here and maybe I'll get sick and...

Fuck.

I don't know.

Oh F#$%, someone hold my hair!

Now if my hair was long enough, this would be an appropriate thing to ask...

If someone was daring enough to get close when I was blowing chunks yesterday.

I got up with a hell of a nasty headache...

Rather, it felt like I had an entire cotton plantation shoved in the sinus cavities of my forehead.

Getting up, I took my normal handful of morning pills, and some stuff to help with my sinus pain.

When I woke backup, Ellie had gotten home from shopping... not that I knew she'd been out anywhere.

She said something about Little Miss throwing up, and at that point, I got up and went to the bathroom.

After 1-2 seconds, I lost the entire contents of my stomach...

and the heaves seemed to demand more!

I hate the dry heaves, actually, I hate puking at all.

Although, whenever my stomach is feeling really shitty, I'd rather heave then wait for it to make itself all the way through the digestive track.

Now, if everyone in the house had been sick, it might've been pretty damn funny!

 Like that stupid Family Guy show where they do about 2 minutes of animated puking over a contest to see who can make it the longest after downing a bottle of ipecac syrup! (Pretty damn funny bit.... Thanks to my coworker Steve for sharing that with me.)

I'm still not feeling 100%, so I'm going to stop here, and get some ice water to sip on, and hope that I don't blow again today...

"Take all your bad feelings and push them down, all the way down past your knees, until you're almost walking on them." - Marge Simpson

That quote comes from a Simpsons episode where she tells Lisa why she has to wear a smile.

Today, and perhaps other days, I just don't feel like I can work around others.

Dress up like I would to be at the corporate building, and put on a smile and work.

I just don't feel "strong enough".

I'm sort of depressed, but not really depressed.

It has been starting by waking up on that new mattress with my back hurting.

Also, I am having trouble sleeping... again...

Mattress aside, I'm just having trouble sleeping.

With the weather turning warm, the kids are starting to sleep downstairs, and Ellie's still working, so I can't stay up watching movies like I want to.

This and yesterday morning I woke up with head congestion.

It took hours yesterday before I started to feel well.

Today, after almost 4 hours I'm still not feeling well.

"Everett, my beard itches"

"I bent my wookie." -Ralph Wiggum

I got up this morning after 2:00 AM with severe sinus pain.

After a while of moving around, I slept until 3:00 AM.

At that point, I crawled into a super hot bad and soaked.

It seemed to help a bit, but it's still giving me trouble.

I ralphed a bit... but not enough to "feel better"...

You know where you're not feeling good, but a good puke makes you start to "feel better?"

I have been trying to work for a bit, but still feel like shit.

My right ear and sinuses hurt like hell, so I made a pot of soup.

That seemed to help, but solve the problem.

So I'm going to just take the day as a paid day off.

I want to feel as good as I can later on.

My wife's oldest nephew is having a farewell party tonight before he leaves for Marine boot camp.

I love this kid more than my oldest, bratty ass daughter.

He's more of a son to me than she is a daughter.

Now Big Miss, is not "Large Miss".

Big Miss, is my middle daughter and just a sweetheart of a girl. :)

So is Little Miss, although, I spoil Little Miss a bit more.

Actually, I spoil both of them quite a bit.

Well, I'm off to find somewhere to relax and feel better.

God Be With You.

It was a good sleep and a good dream.

Perhaps I found a "fix" or a solution for my sinus problems.

Last night I slept so good, that I woke up around 4:30 feeling like I slept better than I ever have in years!

Yesterday, while dealing with tons of sinus pain, I used the ABC Homeopathy symptom checker.  They suggested I try Sepia.  Previously when I looked this up, it was also suggested.  Yesterday, I bought some.

At first, I couldn't tell that it was doing much, but my sinuses eventually drained enough that the pain went away.

Last night before bed, I took some more, along with my usual medication, and slept really well.

What I dreamt though, was of something that I can not physically do these days.  Dancing.

It was like I was at some sort of dancing competition/audition.  Unlike the youth who were dressing in the modern outfits, I donned my dress slacks, suspenders, long sleeved red shirt and tie.

I wasn't sure why I had that dream, but it was something that I don't like to do.

I really don't like dancing.

I can't even walk that far without going into a lot of pain.

So here I go again...

I thought t was doing well

Several hours ago, I got into a tub with really got water and eventually the pain in my legs and hip got better.  Hell, I even fell to sleep.

Now!?

I'm fucking awake with sinus pain.

Sinusitis really, really, hurts and sucks.

So right this second, I'm in the bathroom with a fucking hairdryer trying  hey the sinus pressure down.

I guess I'm going for the damn ice cream next.

Do you know what that sound is princess?

So here I am laying here in bed with a heating pad under my pillow case warning the left side of my head.

It's only 0025 hours.

I've got my sinusitis acting up again.

This time I swear that I can hear the mucus dripping throughout my sinus cavities when I turn my head from side to side.

In going to take a Claritin and perhaps use my flomase.

Sometimes that alone will make it go away faster.

I suppose I'll see.

If not then I start work in another hour or so.

This is why I don't use my cpap machine all the time. Too hard to know when this will happen.

Often the cpap pressure will make it worse and inflame stuff so much that I want to shove a bit poker up my nose.

Wish me luck for getting more sleep.

BTW we bought new screen protectors for our phones!

They weren't listed for our phones, but I'll be damned that very actually fit without cutting them.  They even make the touch screen smoother and easier to swipe type.

That's about all I have day about that.

"Doc, It hurts when I don't do anything." Dr: "WTF?"

I haven't posted anything for a while, since I wasn't near my work computer all week until today.

Sunday night, I had a really bad headache.

I managed to go to sleep for a while before I woke up when the pain got worse.  Again, I managed to go to sleep, only to wake up again another hour or less later.

It still hurt like hell, and so I sat up in my chair eating a weight watchers ice cream bar, trying to cool down my pallet so that it might help get the pressure to go away.

Things still didn't go well, so I went to the hair dryer, and sat there reading a book, changing the temp & speed of the dryer to "hot as hell" to "hot" and "cyclone" to "stiff breeze".

My head & left eye were still in pain, which meant I next went to something hot/warm to drink.  I pulled out the orange drink mix and a hot teapot of water.  Mixing this stuff up isn't really something most people do or like, but I like it.

After the first mug, I still had the really bad pain, so finally went to the caffeine, Benadryl & another pain pill. (I'm only supposed to have 1 extra one a day, and I had used one before bed.)

30+ minutes later, my nose started running and the pain started going away.

Now, if my nose started running and the pressure/pain went away... Why does the doctor still say that it's not a Sinus headache?

I called into work, and slept for several hours before getting up & putzing around the house for the rest of the day.

Tuesday, I still didn't go to work, as I scheduled it off to begin with and went to the dentist for a cleaning.  Unfortunately, the damn chipped tooth didn't get worked on as it seems the dentist was more worried about other things with other teeth.

I still carry a flosser/pick with me so that I can get stuff out of that area of my teeth when it gets jammed in there by the gums.

Today is Ellie's birthday, and she asked me to send her flowers so that she could get them while at work.  On my way home from "The Ogre's" (My shrink) office, I'll stop by the local florist and send over some flowers to her.

I really need to get back to the report I was working on last week.

Currently, I'm listening on a Cyber Security forum, which is interesting.

Many years ago, I was heavily into Cyber Security while working with different divisions of the US military. 

So, I like to keep myself on the pulse of the Cyber Security world.

Today is mostly about how systems that are hacked and hackers really aren't just nerds in their mom's basements anymore.

Pretty soon, I need to get ready to drive into the Ogre's office, and I was going to work from the corporate office today, but decided after last night, I was going to just go in and come back from his office.

Last night!?  Well, about 10:00 PM, a friend called up saying that a resume that he was working on through a website was just "gone" and that it was an emergency to get the resume ready/done for today.

So, I got out of bed, got dressed and drove over to his place.

After a while of looking through the temporary files and attempting to log into the resume site he was going, I finally looked at this resume info.

Turns out that I was able to retype, format and print out the entire resume as he wanted it in less than 20 minutes, instead of the hour+ that I was working on to retrieve the existing resume.

On the way home, going down the dirt road from his house, I almost hit a skunk that was trying to cross the road.  Luckily, I slowed down and damn thing jumped into the small ditch alongside the road.  He just kept running in the ditch as I passed by, and I didn't get sprayed.

I know this was a freaking long post, but I felt I needed to catch up.

It's another saturday night and I ain't got nobody...

Ok, it's not actually Saturday, and I do have somebody...

Yet, today is another day after a really crappy night's sleep.

I wasn't waking up wide alert, but I was waking in pain around midnight and not going back to bed until after 3:00 AM.

Prior to laying down to sleep, I was starting to get one of my sinus migraines.

Trying to use my O2 didn't work as well as I'd like it to.  Breathing it in via the mask I have only made the pain the sinuses worse. :(

Using my CPAP seems to help more than anything with this pain.  I wish that I had the O2 connector for the CPAP mask.  This would allow me to get O2 along with the moisture & forced air at the same time.

I wouldn't sleep with the O2 on, but it'd help me out so that I could get the O2 without the discomfort caused by trying to breath with the O2 mask.

Today, despite being really tired, I'm not depressed/blue.  In fact, I'm a bit stoked, my weight is down to approximately 293 from 320-330 earlier this year.

Perhaps it's not the daily LARGE serving of the Ice Cream that I love so dearly...

Last night, I went with Ellie to run some errands.  One of the places we stopped at is the shop that I buy my incense from.  I finally loaded up again, as it's been about a month since I've had any stick incense.  While at Wal-Mart last night, I bought some of their cone incense too, just because it's cheap and seems to burn OK.

Well, that's not really it.  I think it's more that I buy it from Wal-Mart because it is cheap and when I run out of sticks, the cones work well.

It's raining today, so wonder if the barometric pressure changes is what caused all the pain last night?

Well, I really need to get work done, as the boss sent me a direct email.  These I usually try to answer ASAP, so that way he knows I'm actually working and alive... :)

Sir, are you aware that you're leaking coolant at an alarming rate?

The only thing that's leaking is a post nasal drip.

Lucky me.

It's causing me to feel really nauseated.  Which is really fun, because I really don't want to lose my breakfast.

Sleep last night was much better.  In fact, I don't remember any problems sleeping for a change.

Yesterday afternoon, I sort of stopped working to look up information to help me solve those darn logic puzzles that are in those variety puzzle books that my uncle left me.

I figure that if I'm going to have lots of those books, I might as well learn how to solve all the different puzzles that they contain.

So far I'm pretty good at most of them.  Some of those puzzles are really stupid, so I just skip them.

I wonder if I'm going to order a box of them when these run out?

A bipolar gal that I met through YouTube has a blog which you should probably check out.

+almostalice84.blogspot.ca

She's a pretty neat gal with parrots.

Some of her videos have helped me and I hope that some of my blogs or comments to encourage her have helped her.

Ok, so I'm starting to feel tired.  Mostly, my eyes feel really dry.  If I put eye drops in, the ones I have blur my vision for several minutes, so I usually don't use them.

Well, I really need to show progress on my coding work, so I'm going to stop this blog post here.

Blood of a hen! A little more blood, yes!

I doubt that blood will help me, but I do love "Men in Tights" from Mel Brooks.

Well, the "magic" combination didn't fully work for me yesterday, and already today, less than an hour that I've been up, my head is starting to hurt already.

I took some Claritin...  If the pain gets worse in another hour, I'll try my combination again.

So, I guess what I'm saying is that I really have no full idea what's causing my freaking sinus pain/headaches.

Last night, I had a hell of a time sleeping.  I mean, I was awake 30 minutes after first falling asleep.

Then again, at 1:00 AM, then again around 3:00 AM... Then I think I finally fell to sleep really well.

EXCEPT

I was dreaming about going down the street with my brother when we were teenagers, and a dog was trying to bite me so I kept kicking at it to keep it away from me.

Turns out that I was literally kicking out with my left leg.

Ellie woke me up to tell me that I was shaking the whole bed, and that if I kept doing it, it was probably "restless leg" syndrome and there was "help" for it.

When she finally shut up, I told her about the dream, and promptly fell back to sleep without additional dreams.

I'm not certain why my sleep sucks so badly, except for additional caffeine with the benadryl.

Tonight, we are watching a friend's kids, one of whom is autistic.

I like watching autistic children/people.  Not babysitting, but rather, observing them.

It's interesting to see what they're "thinking" as they roam over the house, what they get into and do.

For example, this girl has a habit of eating the gel window clings we have up for Halloween.

Our ghost is missing its head, and the jack-o-lanterns are missing their black eyes.

If everyone has a cup with a straw, she proceeds to go through sipping from everyone's cup, unless you guard it.  My cup is always guarded. :)

The kids are usually here for several hours, so we feed them.

Only food that they're guaranteed to eat comes from McDonald's, so we'll be eating out again tonight.

I suppose I don't mind eating fast food, but it's harder to find a healthy meal, when you want to scarf down a bacon cheese burger.

mmm... bacon...

Then you get fever, followed by muscle spasms, insanity, coma, and finally, death.

Finally, death...

Wait!

I'm not dead yet!

What I found, finally, again was how to combat my current migraine/sinus pain.

Many moons ago, I would get these same sort of painful symptoms on my way home from work.  Around the same time of the year actually.

What I found, was that if I took Benadryl and caffeine to combat Benadryl's drowsy effects, I could get the problem to go away.

Yesterday, during my pain fight, I took the Benadryl and Caffeine combo, and shortly after the pain was gone and lasted for many hours.

Ok, it lasted for the rest of the night.

Good enough that Ellie and I enjoyed each other last night.

This morning, I feel that it's there... Just at the edge of the bone edge of my left sinus passage.

Well, I already took the Benadryl/Caffeine combo already.

By the way, the Caffeine source is Wal-Mart's "Stay Awake - Caffeine Alertness Aid". Better known to many as No-Doze!

So, that's one of my secrets to curbing and dealing with this type of pain trigger.